Friday Foto - Elaine Alden

This Friday we feature a 23 year old free lance model from Orlando, Florida named Elaine Alden.

That's all I can tell you. Click the picture to get the full effect, and have a nice weekend!

Hero Dog - Watch This!

This is an incredible video. Please watch & enjoy!

Gorilla Coffee Shop Reopens

Two weeks ago the entire staff of the Gorilla Coffee Shop in Brooklyn NY quit their jobs - simultaneously!

This was national news, as we are in a lousy economy and the place was regarded as a neighborhood favorite! One of the employees said that the work environment was “Perpetually malicious, hostile, and demeaning." (Sounds like a couple of radio gigs that I've had.)

Well, after 16 days, the place reopened, today. The early reviews say that the place "Ain't the same!"

Duh! This is simply another instance of employees being under appreciated and probably underpaid. I hope the owners lose a lot of money.

I guess you could that the staff had sufficient "grounds" for quitting.

Newspaper Circulation Clotting

I love newspapers! I used to deliver them as a kid. There was a certain fascination for me with a brand new edition - every day!

Newspaper circulation is dropping. The nationwide drop in the last year was 8.7%. Some of the big boys are really hurting: The San Francisco Chronicle is down nearly 23% in circulation. USA Today slipped 13.6% and the Washington Post is selling 13.1% fewer weekday papers. WHY? We don't read as much. We get our news on TV and the Internet. We don't believe the news media. Newspapers are boring, or at least not appealing to the modern customer.

Can newspapers be saved? Should they be saved?

Face it. This is 2010. The Internet is here. You're reading this now...on the Internet. It's fast and free. Quality of the Internet? It's worth every penny!

Mrs. Trump's Discount Jewelry

Melania Trump is coming out with a line of discount jewelry. She says now that little Barron is in school, she has time for the project. Most of the stuff is priced below $200. We little people are thankful! The trinkets are inspired by her three homes - New York, Palm Beach & Paris. The New Youk line is designed for business women. The Palm Beach line is sporty and the Paris stuff is luxurious.

She begins hawking her wares on Friday, April 30 on QVC. We wish her luck in her effort to supplement her husband's income!

New Buck - No God

This is the new dollar coin. It's "gold" in color and features a picture of George Washington on the front. This makes sense since his picture is also on the front of the dollar bill.

There is concern that the new dollar coin does not contain the phrase "In God We Trust." Because of this, there is a movement to reject these coins, to force them out of circulation. Well, if you feel strongly about this and if you find yourself burdened with a few of these irreverent coins in your possession, there is a remedy! Send them to me! I promise that there will be no questions asked! Simply provide a comment to this post and I will take care of it for you!

Be A Snitch, Get Rich!

The Internal Revenue Service has a program that can earn you up to 30% of someone else's unpaid taxes! That's right, if you have proof that somebody is cheating on their Federal return, you can get a piece of the action. Visit here to get additional info.

You know, come to think of it, I've get this neighbor who has a new car and a new boat and a new riding mower....hmmmmmmmm.

Friday Foto - Shendelle Schokman

This week's Friday Foto features a 27 year old goddess from Pasadena, California. She's Shendelle Schokman and she's done a bunch of modeling. (Go figure?)
As always, click the picture to get the full effect and have a nice weekend!

Lane Bryant Ad

Fox and ABC had some problems with this Lane Bryant ad. Fox refused to run it during American Idol which airs in prime time, at first, until the Lane Bryant people threatened to cancel the ad buy. What do you know? Money talks! The ad aired within the last 10 minutes of the show.



It is interesting to note that Victoria's Secret and Platex have not had any problem airing their commercials. The networks say that they have a problem with the size of the cleavage on the Lane Bryant models. Uh, the commercial targets full figured women. What would you expect? An anorexic twig of a model with the shape of a ten year old boy?

I have two words for Fox and ABC and for Lane Bryant: Cable TV. A limited commercial schedule during American Idol and Dancing With The Stars costs as much money as a complete media blitz on Cable TV!

Network TV is in a coma. Pissing off legitimate advertisers isn't helping...
P.S. these shows are fixed. The producers decide who is eliminated and who stays and, ultimately, who wins. It's all part of PRODUCING a show which is targeted to the largest possible audience.

New $100 Bill

The new $100 Bill was introduced today. They added more color to it and they added anti counterfeiting features to it. I think it looks very fashionable! I would think that $20 bills would be more apt to be counterfeited since they are so much more common and minimum wage cashiers are more likely to accept them.

Whatever, nice job guys, the $100 bill is prettier now than ever! it's a shame that is worth less now than ever!

Ben Roethlisberger: Lucky Guy

The Ben Roethlisberger situation sickens me. It upsets me on several levels. He's an overpaid jock and, after recent developments, he clearly does not deserve his job. The man is a pig. He is a danger. He should be in Jail. He is an embarrassment to real men. His actions are damaging to the NFL, professional sports and to all responsible civilized people.

I love our culture, where if you can win 2 Super Bowls, you can rape women and buy off police officials and get off with a slap on the wrist.

Yeah I know, no convictions and no formal charges - That also sickens me.

If you are a regular reader of this blog and you are expecting something funny, sorry.

Ben, I hope you die broke, as soon as possible.

Fordham "Over" Iona - Watch This!

Im not sure how long Yaho Video will keep this video alive. Check it out!

Kownacki leaps over the catcher @ Yahoo! Video

Pamela's Taxing Problem

This has been going on for a while. I don't remember, I may have mentioned this before, but our ol' pal Pamela Anderson is having trouble paying her taxes. The State of California says she owes just over $493,000 in tax! The fact that she is not paying it, tells me that her net worth is less than $493,000. More accurately, her liquid assets (cash) amount to less than $493,000.
The solution is really quite simple for Miss Pammie! I'm surprised that she hasn't figured this out for herself! I am watching some lame show, at the moment, with some lame commercials. One of these commercials is for J.K. Harris. J.K. specializes in helping people reduce their tax burden. Miss Pammie could offer her services as spokesperson for Harris. In return, they make her tax problems "go away." I think it's a brilliant idea! I don't have any idea of what she should say - what, do I have to think of everything?

It's 4/20, Dude

So, I'm selling a car, this morning and my young customer is signing the credit application and pauses to add the date. I told him that it's 4/20 and he starts laughing! Yes, I'm a dinosaur, but I work with people of all ages and I consider myself to be as contemporary as the next guy. Yes, 4/20 (or 4:20) has significance, but here's why: In the spring of 1971 a group of kids at San Raphael High School in California used to gather after school, at 4:20 PM, and smoke marijuana. "Four Twenty" became synonymous with marijuana. Also, the group used to meet near a wall. The became known as the Waldos.
So, now you can light up a fat one, satisfied to know why we call it 4:20, on 4/20.
This blog does not encourage the use of any illegal substances. However, we like to give advice. To quote Crosby, Stills & Nash: "Be sure to hide your roaches."

Wow, man.

Cellphones Outnumber Toilets In India

India has a lot of people - 1.2 billion. Almost half (563,700,000) of these people subscribe to a mobile phone service. Here's the kicker! Just under 366,000,000 have access to proper sanitation. These numbers come from the United Nations. I mention this so you won't think that I am making them up. I find it interesting that in India, it is easier for almost 200 million people to subscribe to a mobile phone service than it is to get proper bathroom facilities, or, and I hope I'm wrong, having a phone, for some people, is more important than having a pot to piss in!

Sign That The Economy Is Really Getting Bad

Have you noticed that as the economists continue to cry about the economy, American professional sports franchises seem to prosper? Well, in Chicago there is a handful of buildings beyond the outfield walls of Wrigley Field. For eons, Cubs fans have paid to watch their Cubs from the rooftops of these buildings. Well, the building at 3633 North Sheffield Avenue is in foreclosure...no kidding!

The Lakeview Baseball Club owns the building which is famous for featuring a sign in Latin that says "Eamus Catuli," which translated means "Let's go little bears." But the owners of the club were stripped of its control when a Cook County Circuit judge appointed a receiver earlier this month to take over operations.
First Personal Bank of Orland Park filed the suit in February seeking more than $2.7 million in principal and interest payments. The bank loaned the owners of Lakeview Baseball Club $2.8 million in 2006, and made a second loan of $350,000 a year later.

The Lakeview Baseball Club is required to pay the Chicago Cubs 17% of their ticket sales. This country is going straight to Hell!

20 Year Old Woman Banned From Every Pub In The UK

Twenty year old Laura Hall likes to drink! It's hard to believe, but, she drinks so much and so often that she has been officially banned from entering any drinking establishment in the entire UK for two years! She is the first woman to achieve this honor. Laura is also not allowed to purchase alcohol, carry it in an open container or drink in public. All of this stems from a series of convictions for doing things while intoxicated.
She must also attend "alcohol-misuse" classes, which if completed without incident could halve the term of the ban to a single year.

If she violates the order, the woman could face a fine of approximately $3,850.

I have an idea for Laura. Visit Florida, go on Spring Break! You'll blend in perfectly!

Friday Foto - Tess Taylor

This Friday Foto features Tess Taylor, a 20 year old Malibu, California native. Tess is a Playboy Cyber Girl and is featured in the E! cable TV show Pretty Wild. Her mommy was a lingerie model in the 1980's.
To get the full effect, click the picture, and, of course, have a good weekend!

Larry King Getting Divorced

Larry King has filed for divorce from his 7th wife! The marriage lasted almost 13 years. Look at the picture. Does this look like a married couple? Well, the 76 year old King cited "irreconcilable differences." He married Shawn Southwick-King in a hospital room in 1997 shortly before surgery to clear a clogged blood vessel. Sounds like a normal start to a lifetime union.

The couple have two sons, ages 11 and 9. King is seeking joint custody of the boys. He is also asking a court not to award Southwick-King, 50, any spousal support.

"His major concern is the welfare of his children," said Howard Rubenstein, a spokesman for King.

Is Liz Taylor seeing anyone?

Holy Cow! It's Triplets!

People around these parts are excited, real excited! You see, Fred Butts' 11 year old cow, Express Miss Pride, recently gave birth to triplets! For those of you who may not know, this is rare. This is a one in 105,000 rarity. All three calves were born healthy, two heifers and a bull. Their artificially inseminated mother is allowing all three to nurse.

Butts, who owns a fencing company, says his 26 head of cattle are a hobby.

Holy Cow!

Seagal Gets Sued

Let's start by saying in the USA anybody can sue anybody for anything. Of course, it's easier if you have an attorney and if you are suing somebody who has money! If you win a suit against someone who is broke, you're wasting your time!

So, here's the story. Former movie star Steven Seagal hires a 23 year old former model, Kayden Nguyen, to be his executive assistant. (Isn't 23 a little young to be a former model?) Young Kayden says that Stevie was hitting on her. Apparently models are not accustomed to such behavior. I'm not condoning this alleged activity, but we are all grownups, here, right?

In the suit, Kayden says that she was actually hired to replace one of Stevie's two Russian sex slaves, er, assistants.

Stevie's people say balderdash, that Kayden was fired for doing drugs.

Stevie is being sued for sexual harassment, illegal trafficking of females for sex, failure to prevent sexual harassment, retaliation, wrongful termination and false representation about employment.

Let's remember that this is Hollywood. Stevie has a Cable TV show. This may become some kind of promotional vehicle for his little show. We will keep an eye on its ratings.

Food Stamps Hit Record, Again

I'm sure glad that we turned the corner on the recession! The Los Angeles Times reports that about 39.4 million Americans, the most ever, received food stamps in January, the government said.
The number of recipients was up 22% from a year earlier, according to the U.S. Department of Agriculture. The total of Americans getting the subsidy has hit records for 14 consecutive months.
Like I say, I'm sure glad that we "turned the corner" on this recession thing.

2010 Obama Stimulas Package!

C
heck your mail!
I just wanted to let you know - today I received my Obama stimulus package for 2010.
It contained two watermelon seeds, cornbread mix, and 10 coupons to KFC.
The directions were in Spanish.
Hope you get yours soon!

Tiger Boosts Ratings

Love him or hate him, Tiger Woods is good for business! Thursday was round one of the Masters Golf Tournament and ESPN's ratings were up 50% over last year's and 80% better than 2008! Nothing like a whooping sex scandal to boost ratings! This may not work for TV preachers, buy it sure works with a really good golfer, who cheated on a really pretty woman by sleeping with many really sleazy broads!

Late Night TV Movie: "The Fastest Guitar Alive"

I woke up early this morning....it happens occasionally. So, I made some coffee and zipped through the satellite TV schedule and found "The Fastest Guitar Alive" starring....are you ready for this? Roy Orbison. Yup, this was a western, set during the Civil War. Roy and his buddy and a group of girls are traveling through the Southwest with gold that they stole from a mint. They were trying to finance the Confederate Army. Roy played the part of a spy. His guitar was rigged to double as a gun. Actually, the movie was written for Elvis! Elvis turned down the project...and we all know how discriminating Elvis was in picking his movie scripts! "The Fastest Guitar Alive" was horrible, however it had some key elements that peaked my interest - Roy Orbison was the star of the movie! Hell, I never knew he made a movie. I never knew he could act...well, he couldn't, but with enough practice, like Elvis, he could have improved. The movie also had it's share of pretty girls, including Maggie Pierce. Maggie who? Maggie Pierce, she starred with Jerry Van Dyke on "My Mother The Car!" She was the "wife." Also, did you know that Jerry Van Dyke turned down Bob Denver's role on "Gilligan's Island?" Oui, he turned it down for the role on "My Mother The Car."

Finally, on "The Fastest Guitar Alive" there is a brief appearance by Sam The Sham. How can you hate this movie? I'm hoping that they start a satellite TV channel devoted to camp "B" movies of the 50's & 60's. I'd watch....and I'd never get any sleep!

Brewski Ban At Carlsberg

They're hopping mad at the Danish Carlsberg Brewery. 250 warehouse workers walked off the job last Wednesday when they were no longer allowed to enjoy their three daily brews at work. They are still allowed one serving at lunchtime, but the other three have been eliminated. As many as 800 drivers and warehouse workers joined in the job action which continued on Thursday.

This is funny, since I know a lot of guys who would work for free if they were given enough beer. Free? Well maybe not for free, but with the free beer, they'd definitely work for "peanuts"....and maybe some pretzels...