Thursday, December 27, 2007

Breaking Into TV!

This happened last Sunday night, December 23. The driver of a minivan drove his car through a downtown Chicago window onto the set of WLS-TV. This happened during the live broadcast of the 10 PM news.

The driver was arrested for reckless driving and for driving with no insurance.
No one was injured.
The news anchor is Ravi Baichwal. He did a wonderful job of keeping his cool and reporting the "breaking news."

NFL: Everywhere!


Can the Patriots go 16-0? Until recently, you'd have to have access to the NFL network to see (live) if this would happen as they play the Giants in East Rutherford, NJ on Saturday night. The game was to be an NFL Network exclusive. The NFL has agreed to let NBC and CBS broadcast the game, along with the NFL network. This is being done so fans can actually see the game. 60% of American households with televisions cannot receive the NFL network. Why? Because the NFL is too greedy in their negotiations with major cable companies like Time Warner and COMCAST. Until this recent, one time decision was made, who was the loser? The fan, of course. Now that two major networks will broadcast the game, side-by-side with NFL network, what about the NFL Network sponsors? They are set to lose whatever audience they would have had on Saturday night as NBC and CBS waters down their captive audience.

NFL fumbles, again.

Except for the 16-0 regular season milestone, the game is meaningless. Both teams are already in the playoffs. Neither has anything to gain with a win. The Super Bowl is the only prize that either of them wants. So, tune in on Saturday night and watch as both teams replace their starters, early in the game.

If you want NFL Network, I'd suggest Dish Network or DirecTv. I have Dish Network which is great, except when it rains. Oh, and they raise their prices, every month.

What all this means is that, after paying for the NFL Network, I have to live with my wife on a Saturday night with no "CBS Mystery." Thanks, NFL.

Monday, December 24, 2007

Toyota, Insurance Fraud?


The current Toyotathon Television Advertising Campaign has got me scratching my head. There are a number of different commercials in the series. Yesterday I saw two. In the first one, a litle Japanese lady has a chainsaw and is cutting down a large tree that lands on her American made car. The other commercial shows a black man pushing his American made SUV off the top level of a parking garage. I mentioned the ethnicity of the models in the commercials. I did not put them there, Toyota did. What are these commercials saying? That you'd be better off sabotaging your current vehicle and collecting the insurance money than you would be trading your vehicle in on a new Toyota. Does this mean that Toyota dealerships are less than fair in appraising trade-in's? Does it mean that Blacks and Asians should commit insurance fraud as the best and most economical way to buy a new Toyota? Or, is this supposed to be funny? Sometimes I "don't get" Madison Avenue Humor.

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Eddie/Valarie Split


Not much of a surprise, here. Eddie Van Halen and Valarie Bertinelli have been seperated for 7 years. She filed for divorce two years ago. The divorce in now final. He's 52, she's 47. She cited the usual irreconcilable differences for the split, which her publicist described as amicable. Assents have already been divided. Like I say, no surprise, here. They have on son, 16 year old Wolfgang had been living with mommy, probably will continue, there.

Chuck Norris - "Fightin' Mad!"


Chuck Norris is suing publisher Penguin over the book which I have pictured on the left. It looks like it could be a funny read, having watched him for years on "Walker, Texas Ranger."
Here's the deal - The book pokes fun at Norris' movie and TV characters. They say things like, "Chuck Norris recharges his cell phone by rubbing it on his beard." You know, stupid stuff like that. I would think that Norris would have a sense of humor abbout all of this, but there's one problem! Chuck stands to make no money on this project. This, alone seems un-American. Lawsuits are very American. And Chuck Norris is famous for being an American. So this development really isn't that unusual.
Never mind.
Oh...Chuck will win this one. It may take him more than 58 minutes, but, he'll win.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Congratulations, Jamie Lynn!


I told myself that I would ignore this...but I can't. Britney Spears little sister, Jamie Lynn, says she's pregnant! She's 16.
He?
She says she met him in church!
This is actually a smart move on Jamie Lynn's part. She can get all of the child bearing out of the way, you know, popping out a couple of kids and still have time to be a teenage pop star!

You know, I was 16 during the "Summer Of Love," 1967 and.....................oh never mind.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Why?


A friend recently asked why I blog?

What is it?

Why would I want to take the time to send thoughts up to the great wasteland of cyber space?

Well, here's the answer. It's like...uh...a...you know...a hobby. This blog has a counter. I know that nobody reads it, except, maybe, you. That's OK with me. Everyone who really knows me knows that I've always been more interested in quality rather than quantity. Quality is genuine. Quantity involves clutter, including the unworthy.

So there you go! I blog because I like to. I like to express a thought or thoughts clearly within a short period of time or space. Thoughts which ironically are available to millions but read by less than a handful. You could consider this a newspaper column in search of a newspaper.

Monday, December 17, 2007

Wham - Bam, Thank You Pam!


Rick Salomon and Pammie Anderson have been married since October 6th (of this year). She filed for divorce, Friday. This all sounds so Hollywood! I'm wondering what kind of a pre-nup these two had? The way things are going for Pammie, she might want to carry around a "fill-in-the-blanks" pre-nuptial agreement. The photo that I selected for this entry is a candid one. I wanted you guys to see what kind of a physical stud it takes to do a sex video with Paris Hilton and to get Pamela Anderson to say "yes"...to marriage. BTW, did you know that Salomon netted more than $8 million from the sales of his little video with Miss Paris?

As for you, Pammie, since I know that you read my blog often, I'll tell you what you need. You need a man. Not a boy. You've walked down the aisle 4 times with 3 different boys. Now that you know that you need a man, maybe a man who has a regular job? You know, like 9-5, Monday - Friday. I know that you lika-da-bad-boys, but Pammie, get real! You're 40 years old and you've got two kids at home! It's time to play grown-up...for real!

Oh, Pam, one more thing, I'm damn sorry, but, how should I put this? Uh...I am not available...hey...don't any of you gavones laugh! She's done a lot worse, already!

UPDATE: The divorce petition was filed on Friday. It was withdrawn today. Apparently the two "saw eye-to-eye" over the weekend..."
Stay tuned, this ain't over....

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Remembering Who I used To Be


I got an e-mail last night from an old Army buddy. My roommate, in fact. His name is Benny Brown. I mention his name because he made it BIG in broadcasting, in Europe. I hadn't heard from Benny in over 30 years, so the e-mail was kinda haunting. We were both working (and living) at the American Forces Radio Network in Frankfurt. Benny was a lot more serious about his work than the rest of us. Don't get me wrong, all of us who were on the air at AFN in the 70's tried our best and I think we did a pretty good job. Benny was a bit more of a "radio rat" than the rest of us. It paid off for him. He's been recognized by Billboard Magazine as "International Radio Air Personality Of The Year" on a number of occasions. More importantly he's hosted syndicated shows in Italy & the UK. Awesome! I knew that one of us at AFN, during that era, had a shot at making it in the radio business. I'm really not surprised that it's Benny. He's on the air - 7 days a week - on Radio Luxembourg. The adjacent picture is an old one of Benny on the air at Radio Luxembourg, circa 1982. At that time doing a two man show with Rob Jones, sponsored by Cuticura Soap.

All of this makes me wonder if I should have stayed in radio. Maybe I should have stayed in Europe? Ah, but that was such a long, long time ago! Think of all the rednecks I never would have met. A popular radio air personality from Detroit once told me that it doesn't matter where you live and it doesn't matter what you're doing. What matters is if you are happy or not. I should add "healthy", too. After all, some people my age are dead!

Congratulations Benny. You worked for it. I knew it would happen for you! BTW, that's me, in in Terre Haute, listening to the "Classic Rock" and Benny Brown on Radio Luxembourg on the internet at http://www.radioluxembourg.co.uk.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Jessica Alba To Join H'Wood Single Mothers' Club

Jessica Alba has just become a cliche. That's right! She's announced that she is pregnant. Male contributor to this development is Cash Warren. Who? Doesn't matter. Marriage plans? Doesn't matter! Mommy is a millionaire. I should point out that Jessica's acting success and money make here different than the typical trailer park trash single mommies who smother the American welefare system. Good example, JA! I thought you were classy enough to start a family with a husband. But, I'm old fashioned. Women of child bearing age are not interested in what old fashioned guys think. Too bad, Jessica - you're cheating your kid out of having a real daddy.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Now, If The NFL Really Wants To Make Some Money!


Like many American men, and more and more women, I watch a lot of football on Sunday. Not just any football, the NFL! I've noticed that it takes more than 3 hours to play a game. A game with 4 fifteen minute quarters! So for each game thet we watch, we are seeing 2 hours of stuff that we did not tune-in to see. Most of it is commercials. Now, I know the importance of commercials. They bring money to the commercial networks so they can afford to pay the NFL for the rights to carry the games. This is free enterprise at its best! Or is it?

The NFL has its own network, right? Many of us can't see it because our cable companies are too cheap to fork over the money to the NFL to carry the network. This is a side issue and it can take care of itself.

What the NFL should do is broadcast all of its games on it's own network. This eliminates the networks, who in this case are simply "middlemen." Therefore we can cut the commercial time within the football broadcast so that a game will last, say 2 1/2 hours instead of 3+ hours. Schedule two games a day, one at 6PM EST and the next at 8:30 or 9PM EST, Monday thru Friday. This makes 10 games during the week. The other six games would be broadcast as tripleheaders on Saturday & Sunday. This way it would be possible for NFL fans to see every game. The NFL makes more money - each game is nationally televised - and we don't have to watch reruns. So many people would be watching the NFL network on a daily basis that it could be made available to any cable company for little or no charge at all! As for the teams, with games being played every day, it might even be possible for teams to have more than 6 days to recuperate and prepare between games.

Like the idea, NFL? You can use it - for free. Well, OK, if you must compensate me, I'll settle for a sandwich to be named after me. Available at all NFL venues "The General Tom" - a toasted baloney and cheese sandwich. The way you guys charge for food you could easily get 8 bucks a pop!

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

The World Is Searching For...Britney!


That's right! For some rason we can't get enough of Britney Spears! This makes 6 of the past 7 years that "Unfittney" has graced the top spot on Yahoo's annual list of the top searches. In 2006 Paris Hilton was #1, she's number 3 on '07. Number 2 at Yahoo was WWE. Number 4 is Naruto - a Japanese thing. #5 is Beyonce - she could do better with some legal convictions, maybe a half dozen rehab attempts would help. Let's face it, talent ain't enough to edge past Britney. #6 is Lindsay Lohan. Missing from this year's top ten are Jessica Simpson and Pamela Anderson.
I was watching Game Show Network during the wee hours of Sunday night/early Monday morning and I saw a rare episode of the first Goodson-Toddman Quiz Shows. It was called "Winner Take All." This particular episode aired on CBS TV in 1951. It was hosted by a young Barry Gray. This is the same Barry Gray who is idolized by Larry King as the "father of talk radio." Well, anyway, the show was awlful. Gray tried to be funny and was so flat that it was hard to watch. The prizes were household appliances made by companies that I've never heard of. That's odd since I'm old enough to remember when they invented rope. But I digress. 56 years after "Winner Take All" aired we see how much network TV has changed. Aside from the technical advances, we see that people acted, or carried themselves, differently back in the Black & White days of the early '50s. What I'm saying is that I'd rather watch bad '50s TV than bad '00s TV.
I can't help wondering what Yahoo's top 10 searches would have been for 1951?

Brad Pitt: Good Idea, Bad math


Here's something good coming out of Hollywierd. Actor Brad Bitt, you know, Angelina Jolie's boyfriend, wants to build 150 new homes withinn the ninth ward of New Orleans.

Great Idea!

He says that he will put up a maximum of $5 Million to match donations to Global Green USA. The houses would be environmentally friendly and cost an average of $150,000 to build. Lets see $5 Million matched with another $5 Million comes out to $10 Million. If you divide $10 Million by $150,000 you come up with 66. Brad, we applaud your efforts...but your math? I guess Brad is better at "Multiplying" than he is at division.

Banned Commercials

Here's an early holiday gift to boost the value of this blog. Value? That's right! There's an internet site that places a dollar value on blogs. This blog is valued at $24 and change.

Here's what we do to increase the value of this page, click on the following picture and enjoy four commericals that you'll never see on TV. These are supposed to be banned commercials, but they were broadcast on NBC. Go figure? Anyway, then bookmark this blog within your favorites and visit us a couple of times a week.

Enjoy:

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Jingle Belled To Death


Now, I like Christmas as much as the next guy. It's a time to spend with friends and loved ones. A time to celebrate the good things in our lives. The commercialization of the holiday is a fact of life. Many retailers depend on Christmas to balance out the year with a profit. That's OK with me. Do we have to blatently shove Christmas music down our throats? Or, more accurately, into our ears? I have a Yahoo Radio station and it (Yahoo) started playing a large amount of Chistmas music on November 1st. That's wrong! I wish the retailers of the world would realize that we are not going to spend Christmas gift money in proportion to the amount of Christmas music shoved on us! So to the people who program music content on radio stations, I have a reminder. My car radio has buttons on it....and I'm not afraid to use 'em.

Monday, November 12, 2007

Indy Robots Fall


The Indianapolis colts' offense has often been referred to as methodical. I'd rather think of it as being robotic. Remove a few pieces and the robot doesn't improvise or scramble. The closest thing that the Colts have to "winging it" is an outlet pass to Addai when the receivers are covered, Holly Fran Tarkenton!

The Chargers found a way to beat the Colts on Sunday. The Colts have an excellent defensive squad. Their defense played well enough to win the game! BUT, their special teams ain't so special. Score a couple of touchdowns against the not-so-special teams of the Colts and you may get the edge that you need.....or you may just get Manning flustered enough to throw 6 interceptions or you might get Vinitieri to shank a couple of chip shots.
This is why, with the exception of a horse or two, I don't bet on sports.

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Writers' Strike


The Writers Guild has decided to go on strike! They say that they're not being compensated for the profit being made in the new, alternative distribution of their product. I usually don't have much sympathy for people who go out on strike. In its purest form a strike is saying that you aren't happy with conditions to which you and your employer have already agreed.

What makes this different is that America's entertainment is going to be affected! From the Soaps to Prime Time! The good and the bad. Good news is that we won't be subjected to shows like the progressively stupid "Big Bang Theory." The bad news is: More (unscripted) reality shows. Maybe we can get a camera to follow Britney Spears - like we did with Anna Nicole? Naw, Brit hasn't spiraled far enough - yet. More shows like Deal or No Deal wouldn't be bad! Movies wouldn't be bad, either, assumig that our attention span can survive beyond the normal 30 minute sitcom time span.

The bottom line is that whenever the creative process is blocked, it's a bad situation. This strike will not last long. It will soon end for the same reason it started.....MONEY!
In the meantime we can thank God for books, VCR rentals and radio!

Monday, October 29, 2007

A-Rod Opts Out


Hey, Alex Rodriguez, what do you want? It couldn't be money - since you're walking away from $25.2 Million a year to play for the Yankees. Yeah, he had a good year, leading the majors in HRs and RBIs. Could it be that his agent told him that he could get more $$$ elsewhere?

This, friends, is what's wrong with this country. True baseball fans are sucked dry to pay obscene salaries to players like A-Rod who pack up and seek greener pastures at their first opportunity. I watch a lot of baseball on TV. The beer that I drink does not sponsor any MLB team. Aside from my basic satellite TV package, I do not subscribe to any pay TV Channel that directly contributes to the pro sports money madness. And it is madness! Here's an example: The Indianapolis Colts are hosting the New England Patiots this Sunday at the Hoosier, er, RCA Dome. The game is sold out. With more than a week until the game, bad seats were selling on the street for $500! $500? What the hell's wrong with us? You could buy a damn TV for less than that!(or pay a couple of month's heating bills.) These scalped tickets will not be purchased by wealthy people. Wealthy people already have their season tickets. These scalped tickets will be bought by people who will eventually get their very own front row seat......in bankruptcy court. The irony is that a guy like A-Rod can go to any professional game as a non-paying guest!

If the Yankees don't have to pay A-Bomb, er, A-Rod his $25,2 Million next year, maybe they cudda offered Joe Torre a few bucks more? BTW, look for Torre to be talking with the Dodgers.

Britney's Mom: "I could Write A Book!"


I'm not making this up. Britney Spears' mother, Lynne, is writing a book on, of all things, parenting. It's due out on (and I'm not making this up, either) Mother's Day! Having no shame runs in the family. It's another case where a Hollywood celeb is writing a book after never having read one.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Shut Up & Grow Up!

Is there smoke coming from that flame?
I'm watching the local TV news, this morning, and I see a story about smoking on college campuses. Two girls (they looked like girls) were complaining about having to walk through cigarette smoke on campus. Ah! Obviously this is a campus problem worthy of TV News! Obviously we have licked the unprotected sex problem, drug abuse problem, high tuition problem, and of course the insert your own problem with "higher education" here. Yes, unwanted cigarette smoke can be a problem. It stinks. Not as badly as some bodily odors, but, yes, it stinks. Are we all in agreement, so far? Good! Now, let's proceed to the problem which results from the solution of eliminating unwanted cigarette somoke found in the open air. To ban outdoor cigarette smoking from the Vincennes University campus you must take away the right to smoke our of doors. Taking away citizens' rights...is this the American way? Smoking is a legal, adult custom (or habit) which was given to us by the Native Americans, centuries ago. But, if you are in college, you probably already know that.

You know, there are certain dangerous things that General Tom avoids. I avoid walking through bad neighborhoods after dark - especially on payday. Mrs. General Tom & I have decided against Baghdad as a destination for our anniversary trip, this year. You see, college students, as you grow wiser, your common sense grows too! If cigarette smoke bothers you, you should avoid it. While you are at it, you may also want to grow up, stop whinning, get a job and become a productive member of society. I hear Phillip Morris is hiring...

Saturday, October 13, 2007

PETA's Rep


I wasn't going to mention the recent fiasco which has been referred to as Pamela Anderson's wedding. Here's what she's been telling us: That she is in love with a mystery man who is a professional poker player.
That she lost more than $100,000 to the guy in a card came and that she slept with him to settle the debt.
(Isn't love beautiful?)
Then we find out that Pammy has taken out a marriage license.
Logically, this means that she is goig to get married.
She denies this.
She gets married.
Word is "leaked" that she is 2 months pregnant.
(Isn't love beautiful?)
She says that her unexpected pregnancy was fate.
Then word is leaked that she really isn't pregnant.

I mentioned that I wasn't going to mention this. It's obviously a case of a spaced out Hollywood Celeb who will say and do anything to get noticed. I was thinking about the PETA folks. If they are any smarter than Miss Pammy, wouldn't they distance themselves from her. After all, she's made enough stupid decisions....should we decide that her decision to not eat meat is another wacky decision. Don't get me wrong, I don't think the woman's stupid. She has been enormously successful using very little talent. Maybe if she lived in the real world, her bad decisions would, like, maybe, hurt her? (Shutup General Tom and click on the picture.)

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Stengel Lives!


The Chicago Cubs are in the playoffs. For the New York Mets, the season was a game or two too long. That's OK. Each team had a good regular season. There's a common thread between the two teams. Both Willie Randolph, manager of the Mets and Lou Pinella, manager of the Cubs played under the direction and, er, guidance of Billy Martin. Martin was a gifted manager who was the prize pupil of none other than Casey Stengel. That's right! If there could be anything like royalty among baseball managers, this would be it! If I could speak with any person, living or dead, Casey would be in the top 10. If you ever heard the ol' perfessor speak, chances are that I wouldn't be doing much talking.

So, that's it. Just an observation. The more things change, the more things stay the same. As I watched either the Cubs or Mets this season, I saw many nuances in the managers' decisions that reminded me of when I saw Stengel at Yankee Stadium. Casey Stengel lives - in Cooperstown, in Monument Park at Yankee Stadium and in the minds of the men who played for the men who played for him.

Monday, October 1, 2007

Indiana State University Football


I'm waiting for this to get national attention!
After all, we deserve it!
Indiana State University recently fired their football coach. Under the direction of Coach Lou West, the Sycamores were 1 and 25. That sole win was tainted as Coach West used an inelegible player. That's right, ISU cheated when they won their one game in the past 26! This is not meant to be a slam on Coach West, even though It could be and should be, as I could easily have amassed a similar won - loss record - probably without cheating. The real purpose of this post is to ask the question, "What the hell was ISU thinking when they hired this guy?" While the local media is asking why Coach West didn't do better? I'm asking why ISU's atheletic department didn't do better - when they went searching for a coach.

Custody Score: Kevin 2, Britney 0

Britney Spears loses custody of her kids! Shocker? Shouldn't be.
When you act like a high profile slut, you pay the price. I'm guessing that judges have access to the tabloids and the internet where they can see late night pics of Britney, three sheets to the wind, no underwear and her private parts on display. To me, that's the worst part. OK, it's late, you're drunk. Were you drunk when you decided not to wear any panties...and your dress only goes down to....is that a dress? Hey, don't get me wrong, I'm no prude. I won't get specific, but I've done some crazy things. But, I was never a target of an army of papparazzi. If I were, I would have conducted myself differently. So should you, Brit.
Bottom line, here, is that as you mature, or as time elapses from your date of birth, most people take on additional responsibility. You know, like having kids, and actually raising them. We normal people do it all the time on a relatively limited income. Being a multi millionaire is supposed to make it easier!
I've said many times in this blog that it is amazing how money cannot buy class. And we're talking about tens of millions of dollars of net worth - and poor ol' Brit can't muster up enough dignity to win custory of her two boys?
There's another matter. It's legal trouble. In September, our Miss Brit left the scene of a fender bender. The word is that she had no valid drivers' license.
Let's stop here. How much does it cost to hire a driver in California? They say that when a celebrity dies, it comes in "threes." Well to remain current, when a celebrity goes to jail..... There's been Paris, then Nicole, and now (maybe) Britney.

Congratulations, Britney - I'm glad for you that your little song is doing well. In less than ten years you'll be the answer to a trivia question.

Monday, September 17, 2007

From The Weekend



My weekend is probably a little different than yours in that I work 6 days, every week. So, my weekend begins Saturday night, after work. My wife and I eat out on Saturday nights. Occasionally we go to Steak 'n Shake. This week the place was half empty. This seemed odd to me since the Terre Haute Air Fair was going on. This is an annual local attraction that has grown in popularity and attracts folks from all over. You wouldn't know it at Steak 'n Shake! It didn't take long to see why the place was half empty. The menus were brand new, complete with brand new prices. Higher prices. 30% higher on my usual. In time people will become accustomed to the higher price. Coupons will become available. In the meantime, the price difference continues to narrow between food at a family restaurant and a fancy restaurant. The trouble with the nicer restaurants in this town is that they do not take reservations and the Saturday night wait is 30-90 minutes or longer.

Hey I came across some good TV, this weekend. I've seen Charles Osgood on CBS' Sunday morning, before. The show had always seemed to be a little too stuffy for my taste. You know, tree huggers and save the whales. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy a good tree and a good whale as much as the next guy, but I have an extremely short weekend. Recently, they've had some very well done features. Often I see a feature on TV and I don't learn a damn thing from it. Not so on CBS/ Sunday morning. And (and this is important) there was no hidden agenda. Just the facts. The facts that you knew and the facts that you didn't know. All of this presented by Charles Osgood, whose real talent is on the radio. I never heard him do anything as well as hosting the morning shift on WCBS-AM in the Late 60's/early '70's. So, if you don't mind the abscense of wisecracking co-hosts, somewhat pretty news anchorettes and the like, you might like the show.

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Friendship


I'd like to talk a little bit about friendship. Most of us learned about this concept in kindergarten. As we got a little older, we found that friendship does not appear on a Master Card statement. Friendship has nothing to do with money. The millionaire doesn't have more real friends than the laborer. Friendship is seldom a burden, it's basically a nice thing. With all of the lies, deceit and pressure in life, friendship in the great equalizer. It's a birthday card or e-mail. It's a dumb joke in the morning. It's a compliment. It may even be a suggestion of some kind. Nothing more! This post may seem meaningless to you, but I know that some people just don't get it. How sad. How sad for them.

Monday, August 27, 2007

What I've Learned From Rock 'n Roll


Let's face it, Rock Music has been around for more than 50 years. Like any other art form, it is evolving. As a kid I listened to the radio - a lot! It was listening to Dan Ingram and Cousin Bruce Morrow on WABC radio that convinced me that radio was the career for me. What happened? Well, that's a story for another post. Meanwhile, here's some of what I learned from listening to popular music:

"When you ain't got nothing,you ain't got nothing to lose." - Bob Dylan
"They say that looks don't count for much - so there goes your proof!" - Joe Jackson
"Everybody's got something to hide but me and my monkey." - The Beatles (No, not Michael Jackson)
"Hate your next door neighbor, but don't forget to say grace!" - Barry McGuire
"Don't let the past remind us of what we are not now." - Crosby, Stills & Nash
"Be sure to hide your roaches." Crosby, Stills & Nash
Her face, at first just ghostly, turned the whiter shade of pale." - Procol Harum
"And Dion & The Belmonts are in the parking lot stealing hubcaps off the cars." - The 4 Preps
"There ain't no Coupe De Ville hiding at the bottom of a Cracker Jack Box." - Meatloaf
"A pretty face can hide an evil mind!" - Johnny Rivers
"I'm like a one-eyed cat, peepin' in a sea-food store." - Big Joe Turner
"After all, it's what's we've done that makes us what we are." - Jim Croce

So there you have it. It's a brief sampling. Feel free to add some of your own...

Saturday, August 25, 2007

Oh, that Austin Nichols


Not to harp on the subject, but another young Hollywood Actor has been arrested and charged with drunk driving. 28 year old Austin Nichols was caught driving his Mercury Mountaineer the wrong way on a one way street in Jackson, Michigan in the middle of the night. Cops say that young Austin had a blood alcohol content of 0.10 as compared with the Michigan leagal limit of 0.08. The irony is that Austin Nichols is also the name of a liquor distillery. They make Wild Turkey along with many other fine products.

If they throw the book at him, Nichols could get 93 days in jail, a $500 fine and oodles of hours of community service.

Nichols had starred in an HBO series that few people watched and was recently canceled. I bet he wishes he were an actress in California.

Friday, August 24, 2007

Celebrity Justice!


Lindsay Lohan pleads her case and gets one day in jail for two counts of drunk driving and cocaine possession.


The moderately pregnant (Isn't love beautiful?) Nicole Ritchie gets four days and is released in less than 90 minutes due to jail overcrowding.


I can feel a "Law & Order episode in the near future based on these rulings. Loosely based, of course, in the meantime:

That'll teach 'em!

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Rangers Score In Baltimore


Somebody should check what the Texas Rangers have been eating, lately. Wednesday, they beat the Baltimore Orioles 30-3. No team has scored that many runs, in one game, in the majors since 1897. That was the year that the Chicago Colts (now Cubs) edged the Louisville Colonels 36-7.
This was the first game of a doubleheader. The second game went to the Rangers, 9-7. Texas' 39 runs in a twin bill is an American league record. I should point out that the record, held by Chicago, took place during the "dead ball" era, when home runs were rare.

The Texas Rangers batting coach should renegotiate next season's contract - NOW!

The Orioles pitching coach should be practicing the phrase, "Do you want fries with that?"

Monday, August 20, 2007

Duct Tape Bandit


As I get older, I discover more and more uses for duct tape. From Ashland, Kentucky comes another use for the stuff. 24 year old Kasey Kazee, according to police,wrapped his head in duct tape and robbed a liguor store, claiming he had a knife. Kazee was tackled outside the shop by store employees. He made off with $15.
Kazee was charged with first-degree robbery and is being held on $250,000 bond. He pleaded not guilty. My take on this is that this is such a stupid crime, I almost fell sorry for the idiot. As great as this country is, how can we produce people this stupid?

Click here to see the story on MSNBC including comments from Kazee, himself.

Saturday, August 18, 2007

Seagal Blames FBI


Whatever happened to Steven Seagal? In the early 90's his films were big - very big! He blames the FBI and says that his career was damaged because of false reports that he had ties to organized crime and that he intimidated a reporter.
No, that's not why your curent movies are going straight to DVD, Stevie. It's because you are making the same movie over and over, again. That plus the guys who you fight in these movies seem to fall down on their own! Also, there's the age thing. You're 56 years old. Adapt! It looks stupid, on screen, when you are kicking the crap out of young punks who are young enough to be your grandchildren. You don't see a class guy like Sean Connery try to take on the type of roles like he did in the 60's. Of course, I'm comparing apples with oranges, but the principle is still valid. You're 56. Play the part of a 56 year old - otherwise you run the risk of embarassing yourself. That'll kill a career faster that you can say whatever the hell it is you say when you kick someone in the face!

Thursday, August 16, 2007

OFF-erman HIS ROCKER


Jose, you're an idiot!
You've been in the major leagues for 15 years, an all star twice, you are 38 years old and you get hit on the wrist with a slider in a minor league game and you go beserk? Here's what happened. The Long Island Ducks of the Atlantic League are playing the Bridgeport Bluefish, in Connecticut. Offerman, was fooled with a slider which was called a strike. Next, the pitcher throws the same pitch. This one was a little farther inside and hits Offerman on the wrist. Jose thought that the pitcher was "throwing at him!" Common baseball ettiquette says that if you think that the pitcher is throwing at you, you drop your bat, then you run out to the mound and slugg it out. Sounds simple? Jose forgot to drop the bat before swinging it at the pitcher and catcher. Result: Pitcher is injured, catcher suffers a concussion, Offerman is arrested on assult charges and suspended from the league indefinately. The only thing missing is a lawsuit. Being that this is America, and being that Offerman is probably the richest guy on the field - I'm sure the local attorneys are making their calls.

Bridgeport won the game, 7-4. They go at it again, tonight at 7:05 EDT. You can hear the game at www.liducks.com.

Trivia: The manager of the Bridgeport team is Tommy John.

ELVIS: 30 Years Later


Today is the 30th anniversary of the death of Elvis Presley. In 1977 disco music was the main thing. I was working middays at a top 40 station in Terre Haute, Indiana when the UPI machine spit out a very brief headilne saying that Elvis Presley had been found dead in his home. That was it. I was on the air, at the time, and my program director brought the wire copy to me along with a scratchy old Elvis 45 RPM record. I think it was "It's Now Or Never." The irony was that, at that time, we weren't playing any Elvis songs.
30 years later, you can still find an amazing amount of Elvis crap on the internet. I say crap because that's basically what it is, being sold by leeches. If you want to remember Elvis, buy his box set or any of his CD's. If you see an Elvis movie you can be sure that the acting is mediocre. That's OK. You see, every one of his films made money! Can Tom Cruise say that? Elvis' musical popularity was so huge that fans didn't care about his acting. They simply couldn't get enough of him. Looking for proof, still? The proof is huddled around Graceland, this morning.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Dorothy Kilgallen


This has been bothering me for a few days. I thought I'd add it here so it might bother you for a few days too!
Ask anybody over 50 years of age if they remember Dorothy Kilgallen. They'll say, "Sure." Her initial claim to fame was that she was a serious newspaper reporter. This was long before TV news. She was born in 1913 in Chicago. She moved to New York in the 30's, spent a year at my mother's Alma Mater, College of New Rochelle and wrote for the NY Journal American. This is not why we remember her. In 1940 she married. In 1945, she and her husband began a morning show on WOR Radio. It was called "Breakfast With Dorothy & Dick." The show was on from 8:15 AM - 8:55 AM. They spoke mostly about show biz and the contemporary culture surrounding life in New York City. My parents listened to the show - religiously. I hated the show. If you lived in the New York metropolitan area between 1945 and 1964 you would be familiar with the program. But, again, the radio show was not her claim to fame. She was on TV. "What's My Line?" was an extremely popular TV show on Sunday evenings. It was on after Ed Sullivan and Candid Camera. Well, Dorothy Kilgallen was a regular panelist on "What's My Line" and she would try to guess the guest's job. Not too complicated, right? America was fascinated with the show! It was done live, every Sunday night.
So what's bothering me about Dorothy Kilgallen? I hated her radio show, I was too young to stay up to watch "What's My Line?," I didn't read her gossip column. So what is it about Dorothy Kilgallen? I'll tell you what it is. She died under unusual circumstances and nobody seemed to be concerned enough to investigate.
I should back up a bit. Remember when I mentioned that she was a newspaper reporter. Well, in 1964 she went to Dallas to interview Jack Ruby. She was the only reporter to conduct a private interview with Ruby. She returns to New York and tells friends that she has info that will blow the lid off the Kennedy Assassination investigation. Dorothy was having some money problems. Her radio show had been cancelled, her newspaper was doing poorly and her husband became a lot better at spending money than he was at making money. Dorothy decided to write a book. A book would pay a lot more than dumping her Jack Ruby tell-all in her newspaper column! Up until now I've been mentioning fact. The following is speculation on my part and on the part of others. The wrong people heard that Kilgallen was to write about the Assassination. Long story short - Dorothy is found dead in her bed on a Monday morning. Alcohol and barbituates. But, she is found in a bedroom that she hadn't slept in - in years. In bed with her was a book that she had finished reading weeks before. Her reading glasses were not in the room. She had not removed her makeup. She was dressed in clothing that, according to friends, she would never wear to bed. Sound suspicious, yet?
Like I said, I never really cared for the woman - a little too hoitty acting for me. It may have been an act, I don't care. What's important is that she was trying to do her job. Trying to tell us a story - the truth.
Like I said, this has been bothering me for a few days. I don't think the lady committed suicide. I think it was a hit. This is really a double mystery. First her death, second, the lack of answers from any kind of an investigation.
Anybody know anybody at "Dateline NBC" or "20-20" or "48 Hours?" Just wondering.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Rizzuto


Sad news. Yankee Hall Of Fame shortstop Phil Rizzuto died, yesterday. He was 89. Rizzuto was incredibly popular in the New York area for decades. He was American League MVP in 1950. I could say a lot of nice things about the guy, like he taught the game of baseball to us kids as we listened to his Yankee broadcasts. He'd give advice on how to play the game. He's tell us not to copy a particular batter's stance. He was one of the good ones. In his entire career, do you know how many times he was kicked out of a ball game? Never! Not once! Rizzuto was a rare combination of "class" without a lot of polish. People who knew him say that he always made you feel welcome. This is a lesson for all of us. He broadcast Yankee games on radio and on TV for 40 years. Listening to him was like sitting next to a friend at a game. He'd talk baseball, but he would also talk about other things. Many other things, like the difficulty of telling boys from girls at the ballpark, his love of old movies, golf and the one time that he shot a hole-in-one! He was never too serious about himself - claiming to prefer radio to TV because on radio people can't see and you can make things up.
He was semi retired from broadcasting when Mickey Mantle died. Phil wanted to go to the funeral. His broadcast bosses said no. Phil stayed and later quit. One of a kind, certainly.
We'll miss him.

Rizzuto Tribute

Rizzuto "on" Seinfeld

Monday, August 13, 2007

Leno's Serious Side


Jay Leno wrote this; it's the Jay Leno we don't often see....
"The other day I was reading Newsweek magazine and came across some poll data I found rather hard to believe. It must be true given the source, right?
T he Newsweek poll alleges that 67 percent of Americans are unhappy with the direction the country is headed and 69 percent of the country is unhappy with the performance of the president. In essence 2/3s of the citizenry just ain't happy and want a change.
So being the knuckle dragger I am, I started thinking,''What we are so unhappy about?''
Is it that we have electricity and running water 24 hours a day, 7 days a week? Is our unhappiness the result of having air conditioning in the summer and heating in the winter? Could it be that 95.4 percent of these unhappy folks have a job? Maybe it is the ability to walk into a grocery store at any time and see more food in moments than Darfurhas seen in the last year?
Maybe it is the ability to drive from the Pacific Ocean to the Atlantic Ocean without having to present identification papers as we move through each state? Or possibly the hundreds of clean and safe motels we would find along the way that can provide temporary shelter?
I guess having thousands of restaurants with varying cuisine from around the world is just not good enough. Or could it be that when we wreck our car, emergency workers show up and provide services to help all and even send a helicopter to take you to the hospital.

Perhaps you are one of the 70 percent of Americans who own a home. You may be upset with knowing that in the unfortunate case of a fire, a group of trained firefighters will appear in moments and use top notch equipment to extinguish the flames thus saving you, your family and your belongings.

Or if, while at home watching one of your many flat screen TVs, a burglar or prowler intrudes , an officer equipped with a gun and a bullet-proof vest will come to defend you and your family against attack or loss. This all in the backdrop of a neighborhood free of bombs or militias raping and pillaging the residents. Neighborhoods where 90 percent of teenagers own cell phones and computers.

How about the complete religious, social and political freedoms we enjoy that are the envy of everyone in the world? Maybe that is what has 67 percent of you folks unhappy.
Fact is, we are the largest group of ungrateful, spoiled brats the world has ever seen. No wonder the world loves theU.S., yet has a great disdain for its citizens. They see us for what we are. The most blessed people in the world who do nothing but complain about what we don't have , and what we hate about the country instead of thanking the good Lord we live here.

I know, I know. What about the President who took us into war and has no plan to get us out? The President who has a measly 31 percent approval rating? Is this the same President who guided the nation in the dark days after 9/11? The President that cut taxes to bring an economy out of recession? Could this be the same guy who has been called every name in the book for succeeding in keeping all the spoiled ungrateful brats safe from terrorist attacks?

The commander in chief of an all-volunteer army that is out there defending you and me? Did you hear how bad the President is on the news or talk show? Did this news affect you so much, make you so unhappy you couldn't take a look around for yourself and see all the good things and be glad?

Think about it.....are you upset at the President because he actually caused you personal pain OR is it because the "Media" told you he was failing to kiss your sorry ungrateful behind every day.

Make no mistake about it. The troops in Iraq and Afghanistan have volunteered to serve, and in many cases may have died for your freedom. There is currently no draft in this country. They didn't have to go

They are able to refuse to go and end up with either a ''general'' discharge, an ''other than honorable'' discharge or, worst case scenario, a ''dishonorable'' discharge after a few days in the brig.
So why then the flat-out discontentment in the minds of 69 percent of Americans? Say what you want but I blame it on the media. If it bleeds it leads and they specialize in bad news. Everybody will watch a car crash with blood and guts. How many will watch kids selling lemonade at the corner? The media knows this and media outlets are for-profit corporations. They offer what sells , and when criticized, try to defend the ir actions by "justifying" them in one way or another. Just ask why they tried to allow a murderer like O.J. Simpson to write a book about how he didn't kill his wife, but if he did he would have done it this way......Insane!

Stop buying the negativism you are fed everyday by the media. Shut off the TV, burn Newsweek, and use the New York Times for the bottom of your bird cage. Then start being grateful for all we have as a country. There is exponentially more good than bad.

We are among the most blessed people on Earth and should thank God several times a day, or at least be thankful and appreciative."

"With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one end to another, and with the threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks, "Are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?"

Jay Leno

Hey Vick, Chew On This!


Now this is clever! I saw it on the news. The guy who came up with this idea deserves to become a millionaire. It's the Michael Vick Doggie Chew Toy. I'm told that it is very durable. Some of the proceeds from this product go to animal shelters! There's more to it....like the company's mascot is "Vick" the pit bull. Vist the product's site by clicking here.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Vick Fumbles A Career


Hey, Michael Vick! Could you possibly be this stupid? The whole dog thing! What the hell kind of mentality do you have? Only in America could a sicko like Vick be signed to a 10-year, $130 million contract in December 2004. He has been paid about $44 million, including $37 million in guaranteed bonuses, and is due to earn a base salary of $6 million this season.

If he plays.

Monday, July 9, 2007

Butt Tax = Fewer Packs


Picture this, I live in Ilinois and I work in Indiana. I smoke. My brand of cigarettes used to cost $.15 a pack more in Illinois than they did in Indiana. That was until July 1, 2007. The Indiana cigarette tax went up by $.44 a pack. This makes my brand of cigarettes $.29 a pack cheaper in Illinois than in Indiana. Good for me. I buy my smokes, now, in Illinois. I buy 500 packs a year. 500 X $.44 = $220.00. That's the amount of money that Indiana Governor Mitch Daniels thought he could take from me, beyond the tax that the state has been taking from me for years. The tax has gone from 15.5 cents per pack to 99.5 cents in just five years. Indiana just wasn't happy enough with what they were already sucking out of us smokers! Now, from me, they lose what they had been getting plus any increase they were dreaming of!

There's a lesson to be learned form this, Mitch. That lesson is: "Sometimes half a loaf of bread is better than no bread at all!"

Smoke 'em if you got 'em.

Mazda = NO CLASS


Watching a Mazda Network TV commercial, last night I see them talking about their brand new SUV. They compare it favorably to Nissan's Murano. This, in itself, is silly - but it gets better...or worse... Then, they show the Mazda SUV pull up to a stoplight, beside a Nissan Murano. Both cars are apparently on demo rides - customers are behind the wheels of the Mazda and the Nissan with salesmen sitting in the passenger seats. The Mazda salesman leans out of his window and gives his business card to the customer who is driving the Murano. The Nissan salesman immediately grabs the business card, in desperation, and throws it out of his passenger side window. This is supposed to be funny.
FUNNY? No. It shows a lack of professionalism on the part of the Mazda salesman. I would never buy a product (are you reading, Mazda?) form a salesman who lowers himself to those tactics! For a sales person to intentionally interupt another sales person while selling is an absolute violation of basic decent behavior. It shows lack of manners, too. If this is funny, what does it say about us? What does it say about Mazda??

Here's the solution:
Stop running the ad.
Fire the ad agency who wrote and produced the ad.
Fire the Mazda "suit" who approved the ad.

While you're at it, fire the guy who hired him.

Oh, and by the way, in the commercial, the Mazda salesman was more handsome and fit than the Nissan salesman. In the real world, this is never the case!

Monday, June 25, 2007

Stuff From The Weekend


So, I'm watching 60 Minutes, last night, on CBS and there's a commercial for Dish Network with Pamela Anderson - followed immediately by a Kentucky Fried Chicken Commercial! Am I the only one who saw the irony (of sorts) in this placement? Miss Pammy has been very vocal about the Colonel's treatment of chickens. She's also vegetarian.
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Watching the Mets - A's game on Friday night. The Met's catcher gets tossed for disputing call strike 2. His replacement is the backup catcher, Ramon Castro. Castro doubles to left in the bottom of the ninth and scores the winning run on a double by Wright to right (field).
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Note to rednecks: GROW UP! This ain't halloween. Are there any Dentists or laundromats in this town? If there are any, they're outnumbered by really bad tattoo parlors. Rednecks can't possibly be as dumb as they look!

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Marty Brennaman's Choice Of Words...


I love baseball and I love broadcasting. I really hate stupidity. All three of these things came together, recently. Here's the story:

Reds broadcaster Marty Brennaman apologized on the air for comparing Cincinnati's upcoming road trip to the Bataan Death March.

Brennaman told radio listeners during the Reds' game Tuesday night against the Angels that he was wrong to make the comparison in an earlier broadcast, "and I profusely apologize."

Thousands of captured U.S. and Filipino soldiers were forced to walk 70 miles to a concentration camp during World War II, many dying along the way. A radio listener in New Mexico heard Brennaman's remark about Bataan and sent the Reds an e-mail objecting to the comparison.

The Reds' next road trip takes them to Oakland, Seattle and Philadelphia. Cincinnati has the worst record in the National League.
-0-
Here's my take on this. Why did the only objection to this remark come from a listener in NEW MEXICO?

Brennaman may have done a service to his listeners, in Ohio, Kentucky and Indiana by providing a history lesson.

American Vs. Imports


So, I'm at work today and I meet this guy who's driving a Chevy Express Cargo Van. I took a picture of the sign that he put on the back of it. You may have to click on the picture to get the full size version and read what it says. The guy is self employed in the delivery business, delivering car parts all over the USA. He's very serious about the importance of buying "American." Truth is, when you buy an American car, some 40 different companies, mostly American, benefit from your business.

This is a touchy subject since we are living in a free country, and since Americans don't like to be told how to spend their money. Are the imports better in quality or value? I drive an imported car. My spouse drives a Chevy. I am around cars all day.

My opinion? Thanks for asking!

Most people know very little about cars. When comparing an import with a domestic passenger car there really is not a lot of difference. The cost is similar, the fuel economy is similar, the warranty coverage is similar. So what's the big thing about the imports?

I'll tell you what it is. In a word, it's insecurity. People are buying brands of automobiles to give the appearance of being "smart." It is fashionable to drive imported cars. Part of the blame is on the American car makers, but in today's car market you can find American cars to be every bit as stylish or non stylish as any of the imports.

Getting back to our friend who was driving the high mileage Express Van. He spoke with a heavy European accent...go figure...

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

NBC Skips Stone


First it was John Seigenthaler, now it's Stone Phillips - both gone from NBC News. Each was found guilty of making too much money! What about the person or people who agreed to pay these guys "too much money?" More importantly, how much is "too much money?" If your programming is so superior that people "must see" it, the ad revenue will follow! This means that the network makes money even after paying their expensive hunks of beef, in this case, John & Stone. This type of hindsight management interests me.
I was once fired from a radio station in a cost cutting move. My air shift was the only one to increase in ratings. My pay, at the time, was pocket change above minimum wage. (Thanks, Harvey, you did me a favor!)
Back to Seigenthaler and Phillips, don't sweat it, guys. Each of you can write a book and/or teach. I can see thousands of bright eyed journalism students, eager to soak up whatever you have remaining inside you.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Life Is Short...


From the Windy City comes a new low from the legal profession. The same people who tell is that bankrupcy is the answer have come up with another suggestion.

The billboards were removed after public criticsism.

Wouldn't "good taste" have prevented this in the first place?

Oh, I don't recall signing a release for the picture on the right. The girl, well, nice outfit!

Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Katie, nobody's watching...


CBS Evening News is hurtin' for certain. During the last week of April they had their lowest viewership in 20 years! About 6 million daily viewers as opposed to ABC's 8.1 million with Charlie Gibson and 7.5 million viewers for NBC's Nightly News with Brian Williams. If Katie Couric was so popular on the NBC Today Show, why is she stinking up the place at CBS? Maybe CBS should ask a newsman about their ratings problem. Most of the CBS Evening News is FLUFF. Now, fluff is OK....on a news magazine show. Today was a sort of "magazine show." Hard news dominating an evening newscast? What a concept!

Here's CBS' solution. Fire two people: Katie Couric and the person who hired her. Oh, and while you are passing out pink slips, give one to the person who produces the show! So who should sit in the chair? John Roberts, reading real, hard news stories - with a daily commentary segment from Don Imus! You want ratings? You'll get your ratings!

Thursday, April 26, 2007

The Prius Fantasy


The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency says that the Toyota Prius Hybrid gets 60 miles per gallon in city driving. Truth is closer to 45. Explanation? The government agency goofed! If you are shocked, you haven't spent much time around government workers. I hope they (government workers) bought the Prius, in large numbers, so that they may enjoy their own incompetence. All of this gives new meaning to the saying, "Close enough for government work."

In the car business, if something sounds too good to be true, it probably is. BTW, don't blame Toyota for the EPA's miscalculation. You can blame Toyota for the much celebrated stalling problem and for the lofty Prius MSRP.

I am waiting for the day when all of the individual independent consumer agencies start investigating each other to see who's doing their homework...or not. Mike Wallace, are you reading this?

ROSIE & THE DOW


A few observations, today. The Dow Jones Industrial Average rose to over 13,000 for the first time in history, yesterday!

Huh? What does this mean? It means that people who have money will feel comfortable spending some of it. Spending it on small things and especially larger ticket items like, gasp, cars and homes. This means that the economy picks up......at least a little. This is good for everybody! So what do we hear on the radio, this morning? Rosie is leaving "The View", nobody got tossed from "American Idol", The Indiana Pacers are looking for a new coach and Alec Baldwin wants to get out of his NBC contract after his ex leaks a tape of a private telephone conversation of his - to the internet! All this fascinating dribble takes preference over the Dow's milestone.

I think we're all bozos on this bus.....

Saturday, April 14, 2007

One More Thing About Imus...

The Imus situation bothers me. I couldn't put my finger on it, until I read the attached commentary from Jason Whitlock of the Kansas City Star. If it matters to anyone, Mr. Whitlock is an Afro American.

As for Imus' future? Look for the radio Hall Of Famer to move to satellite radio......if he wants to.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Under 30? Read This!

A very self-important college freshman attending a recent football game, took it upon himself to explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why it was impossible for the older generation to understand his generation. "You grew up in a different world, actually an almost primitive one," the student said, loud enough for many of those nearby to hear. "The young people of today grew up with television, jet planes, space travel, man walking on the moon, our spaceships have visited Mars. We have nuclear energy, electric and hydrogen cars, computers with light-speed processing and," pausing to take another drink of beer.

The Senior took advantage of the break in the student's litany and said, "You're right, son. We didn't have those things when we were young........so we invented them. Now, you arrogant little shit, what are you doing for the next generation?"

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Minus Don Imus


Make no mistake about it, what Don Imus said on the air was wrong. It was hurtful to some, embarassing to others and possibly fatal to his career. Having sat behind a microphone for 16 years, I am well aware that you can say anything once. This may be the case for Don Imus. What's going to happen? Remember that Imus is big business. Big business cares about only one thing - THE BOTTOM LINE! Damage control will make sure that the least amount of money is lost due to this matter. How this is done will be most interesting. There is a second wave to this story. This wave is on the horizon and is not being addressed. This is it: Backlash. You cannot legislate respect. The FCC cannot, the legislative branch cannot, and neither Jesse Jackson nor Al Sharpton can. How will Don Imus fans react if he is fired? Should we care? Keeping Imus on the air or canning his ass...which will bring us closer together? Are Jesse and Al the ones to ask?

Friday, April 6, 2007

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Richards Denies Snorting Pop


So the internet is all lit up with stories about Rolling Stones' guitarist Keith Richards getting high on his dad's cremated ashes. The guy is often a parody of himself, but in this case, he says he was joking when he told a reporter that he mixed his father's ashes with some cocaine and......

For the record, Richards is 63. His father, Bert, died in 2002 at age 82.

On another note, click here for a funny commercial. ..or at least I thought it was funny...