Cotton Pickin' Common Tater

Rick Sanchez of CNN slipped up, today. At least, he says he slipped up. He was talking about President Obama and he was trying to make a point and he finished his thought saying that Obama is "the cotton pickin' President." After the commercial break, he said that he noticed that some of his Twitter friends tweeted that he probably should not have described our President in such terms. The phrase might be taken as a racial dig. He then goes on, at length, apologizing for the remark.

Hey, look! I used to make a living doing LIVE TV. Granted most of my stuff was scripted and I had my eyes glued on the teleprompter, but not all of it was scripted! Being on CNN is a big deal! A large amount of preparation should go into ad libs! As far as I'm concerned, you can file this one under "The things we do for ratings." We, the TV audience, have a short attention span. If you have something to say, say it and move on. We will hear the same story over and over again!

But, on the other hand, he is handsome!

Those Drunk Baboons...

This is my kind of story! Judging from the title, you may be expecting a story about Terre Haute, Indiana on a Saturday night! Not quite! For this one, we travel to South Africa where the local baboon population, living in the hills surrounding Cape Town, are venturing into the Groot Constantia vineyards. Being hungry baboons, they help themselves to the grapes, some of which have fallen to the ground and fermented. I hear that they are partial to the Sauvignon Blanc grape. So...the baboons eat the fermented grapes and get, er, tipsy. Don't you hate it when drunk baboons vandalize the neighborhood! In this case, the neighborhood is the fashionable Cape Town suburb of Constantia.

I know that this is a serious problem, but the thought of drunk baboons raising hell in a ritzy neighborhood, somehow amuses me...

Congresswoman Gives Scholarships To Relatives

I've long been a fan of term limitations. There's nothing like fresh blood in public office! Term limitations also reduce the likelihood of impropriety. Take the case of Texas Congresswoman Eddie Bermice Johnson. EBJ has been in the U.S. Congress for 18 years. Like every member of congress, she is up for reelection in November.

After be accused, she admitted to awarding thousands of dollars in college scholarships to four relatives and a top aide's two children since 2005, using foundation funds set aside for black lawmakers' causes.

The recipients were ineligible under anti-nepotism rules of the Congressional Black Caucus Foundation, which provided the money. And all of the awards violated a foundation requirement that scholarship winners live or study in a caucus member's district.

Johnson, a Democrat, denied any favoritism when asked about the scholarships last week. Two days later, she acknowledged in a statement released by her office that she had violated the rules but said she had done so "unknowingly" and would work with the foundation to "rectify the financial situation."

Johnson is expected to be reelected, easily. Someone once told me that everybody in Texas is crazy. This, of course, is not true. The majority of voters in Johnson's Dallas district are crazy...for at least the past 18 years.

Strippers Picket Church

Warsaw, Ohio is a small town - about 900 people, one stop light, one gas station...you get the idea. Well, there's a strip club, The Fox Hole and there's a fundamentalist Christian church, New Beginnings Ministries. The church as been taking photos of license plates on vehicles parked outside the strip club and harassing the club's patrons. They've been doing this for four years. The church people have also been picketing the club.

For the past three months, the strippers have been picketing the church. (This may help church attendance!) The girls have been carrying signs with bible verse which they say applies to them, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you," you get the idea...

Club owner Tommy George offered an olive branch to Pastor Bill Dunfee. The preacher says that he's working for a "higher power" which does not want the strip club in Warsaw. The church and the club are nine miles apart.

The sad thing is that both the preacher and the club owner are actually taking all of this seriously!

False Alarm At 30,000 Feet

Earlier this week, 275 passengers on a British Airlines flight were treated to a bit of a fright. A prerecorded message came over the plane's speaker system telling passengers to brace for an emergency landing over water!

Immediately, the crew assured passengers that the message was a mistake and that there was no danger. The captain had pressed the wrong button! At the time, they were flying above the North Sea from London to Hong Kong.

Two things: If British Airways really had class, it would be "Free drinks for everyone!"
Also, if the captain pressed the wrong button, triggering the emergency message, do you think he will remember to push the right buttons to land the plane safely?

Gay Bar Beside Mosque At Ground Zero?

Greg Gutfeld is a TV talk show host at Fox News. He has an idea. Here at the blog, we are "all about" ideas! Gutfeld says that the proposed Islamic Center should be built near the ground zero site. It's OK with him, so long as the place is built on private property and the local laws are followed.
Well, in a parallel gesture, Gutfeld says that he is seeking investors to join him in building a gay/Muslim bar - beside the mosque. Muslims do not allow gay relationships nor the drinking of alcoholic beverages. Gutfeld says that he is interested in "building bridges" between the two cultures!
Some of the proposed names for the gay bar: "Turban Cowboy," You-Mecca-Me-Hot," "Yo Ji-hump," or "Suspicious Packages."

U.S. Birth Rate Drops For 2009

The birth rate in the United States fell by 2.7% in 2009! The birth rate, which takes into account changes in the population, fell to 13.5 births for every 1,000 people last year. That's down from 14.3 in 2007 and way down from 30 in 1909, when it was common for people to have big families.

The situation is a striking turnabout from 2007, when more babies were born in the United States than any other year in the nation's history. The recession began that fall, dragging stocks, jobs and births down.

What does this mean? It means that we are finally figuring out that, unless you're on welfare, it is expensive to have a child and to raise it! The rate of decline would have been much larger, but some of us are still having accidents, or I mean, eh...surprises!

This is not good! If we don't have kids, who's going to pay off our national debt??

Friday Foto - Regina Deutinger

This week's Friday Foto takes us to Germany and 27 year old Regina Deutinger. Regina is a model from Munich and has done some work for Playboy.
Click the picture to get the full effect and have a nice weekend!

Norfolk City No-Show Gets Paid For 12 Years!

There's a person who works for the Norfolk, Virginia Community Services Board who has been paid for the past 12 years, with full benefits - only one thing, he (or she) hasn't shown up for 12 years! Executive director, Maureen Womack refused to name the employee nor the money amount involved. She says that she fired this person! The agency employs roughly 300 people with an average salary of $35,000. The Community Services Board provides about 6,000 of Norfolk's poorest residents annually with medication, counseling and other psychiatric services.

Sounds like a great place to work, especially if you are lucky enough to get fired!

Help Wanted: Ebonics Translator

If ya speak Ebonics an' can translate it ta real English, da Drug Enforcement Administration may gots uh job fo' ya! be understanding dis negroid-american languag foo'

The DEA announced this week that it is seeking 8 full time Ebonics Translators. Actually, the DEA has workers who can translate 114 different languages into English.

I suppose, as usual, women and minorities are encouraged to apply!
(Thanks Benny!)

$578M School Opens in LA

This is why the rest of the world hates us! In the Los Angeles, there's a new school getting ready to open up. It sits on 23 acres and will teach the eager minds of kids K - 12. It's called the Robert F. Kennedy Community Schools and will have an enrollment of 4,200. Keep in mind that in Los Angeles, nearly 3,000 teachers have been laid off over the past two years, the academic year and programs have been slashed. The district also faces a $640 million shortfall and some schools persistently rank among the nation's lowest performing.
If we want to do our kids a favor, if we want to give them the best possible education, maybe we should dump the landscaping and the lofty architecture and get some gifted, professional, effective teachers.

Naw, that's old fashioned and cruel...what the hell was I thinking!

Miss Mexico Crowned

Miss Mexico, Jimena Navarrete of Guadalajara is the new Miss Universe. Her response, concerning the importance of teaching children the importance of family values, appeared to please the judges. She's 22 years old.

The favorite was Miss Ireland...favorites seldom win. I was told that Miss Jamaica was looking good, too.

I find this annual event to be rather religious, thinking that God actually designed these creatures. The problem is that he made them "limited editions!"...

Tiger On The Loose!

This is almost a non-story. Tiger Woods and his wife Elin are officially divorced. This comes 9 months after we found out about his zipper problem. It is estimated that Tiger has lost $35 million in endorsements. Elin is rumored to be receiving $100 million, a mere fraction of the Woods fortune. This means that she will never have to work, for the rest of her life. She can even afford to marry a poor man!

This would be a good time to heighten the alert for all cocktail waitresses within 100 miles of any PGA event!

Howdy Doody Creator Dies

Buffalo Bob Smith was the "front man," but Edward Kean was the guy who put the whole thing together. Kean was the primary writer. He invented the word "kowabunga!" Many of us remember that the show always began with buffalo Bob saying, "Hey kids, what time is it?" The peanut gallery would shout, "IT'S HOWDY DOODY TIME!" Then, the show's theme song would come on and we would all sing, "It's Howdy Doody time, it's Howdy Doody time...." If you weren't part of it, it probably makes little sense. The Howdy Doody Show was simple and pure. It was fun for the kids and we couldn't get enough of it. Edward Kean wrote the theme song and had much to do with the direction of the show through 1955. Kean died in Michigan, he was 85.

9 Day Rush Hour In China

It's a traffic reporter's heaven! A nine day, 60 mile traffic jam on the Beijing-Tibet Expressway! Traffic had been heavy in June and July, but it's worse now. The main problems are construction delays. Sound familiar? The number of cars (traffic) has increased faster than the national highway system can keep up. It's like Chicago's rush hour traffic "on steroids."
The major traffic problems are expected to continue on this stretch until mid September when construction is scheduled to be completed.
As my favorite traffic reporter, Marysol Castro used to say, "It's a books-on-tape kind of morning!"

Quick Quote

The best minds are not in government. If any were, business would hire them away.
- Ronald Reagan

Piers Debut Delayed

Larry King's retirement has been put on hold. King's replacement, Piers Morgan is having trouble getting the proper authorization to work full-time in the USA. As a British citizen, Morgan needs a special visa that will allow him to work full-time in the US -- and those types of visas are increasingly difficult to get, according to lawyers who specialize in the field. Solution? Originate the show from outside the US for the necessary number of days? I like Morgan. I think he's qualified for the job, especially since CNN can't seem to find a suitable American to sit in King's seat.
An alternate solution? Jerry Springer!

Back To School

Tchools around here are back in session. This is wrong. This is just another reason why so many of our school systems continue to get a failing grade. Labor day is an important day to be celebrated with family (mother, father and children) during the summer season BEFORE the start of school. The early start to the school year dates back to the time when kids used to help their families on the farm. An early start would lead to an early end to the school year. Make sense? Not no more! Kids don't help on the farm. They've been replaced by machines or illegals. Let's talk about the weather. Is the late May weather better than the late August weather? Yes, if you like severe thunderstorms. Are you more likely to go swimming or fishing in August or in May? Let the kids play in (all of) August. My idea is to have school begin on the Thursday AFTER Labor Day and continue through the Friday before Memorial Day. You can get the kiddies ready for the real world with 5 day vacations for Christmas and another 5 days at Easter. Throw in days off for Federal holidays and you can easily find 180 (or more) days of class time. Snow days can be figured in too depending to your area.
To sum up, schools are for kids. Kids are (gulp) different than adults. Let 'em play in the summer and learn between Labor Day and Memorial day. Good God...football can wait!

Friday Foto - Roxanne Pallett

This week's Friday Foto features Roxanne Pallett. Roxy is a 27 year old English actress and singer.



For the full effect, click the image, above, and stand back!
Have a nice weekend.

Rocket: Hall Of Shame

I never liked the guy. Roger Clemens was one hell of a pitcher, but off the field, to me, he came off as being a jerk. Well, he's been indicted on Federal charges for allegedly lying to Congress about using steroids. The 7 time Cy Young Award winner testified in February of 2008. He could "do time" if he is convicted. This will not happen. Clemens will come out of this, just as all of the other jocks have in the past.

It's really pretty funny when you think that Congress has their own problems to consider....like re-election!

Eggs-actly A Problem!

When you read this, keep in mind that I made myself a two-egg mozzarella omelet, this morning. The current egg recall has expanded to 17 states. It is estimated that up to 380 million eggs may be affected! The "bad egg" in this case is Wright County Egg of Galt, Iowa. The problem is salmonella. States which may be affected are, California, Arizona, Missouri, Minnesota, Texas, Georgia, Washington, Oregon, Colorado, Nevada, Iowa, Illinois, Utah, Nebraska, Arkansas, Wisconsin and Oklahoma.

The folks at Wright County Egg are walking on egg shells, being investigated for a number of things including their hiring practices. They've been investigated before.

In the meantime, it's Fruit Loops for breakfast tomorrow morning. Yippee!

Mosque, My Ass!

If you have any doubt in your mind that the Muslim world is mocking the United States with their proposed living center/mosque within 600 feet of ground zero, they plan on dedicating the place on September 11, 2011! That's right, 10 years to the date following the attack on the World Trade Center! I guess some of don't know when we are being slapped in the face! This will be one of the largest Mosques in the world!

I might suggest a large fire insurance policy.

Bobby Thompson Dies at 86

One of the great guys of baseball died Monday night. Bobby Thompson had been in ill health. Never close to being a Hall-Of-Famer, Thompson was a good player. He described himself as an accidental hero. On October 3, 1951, the New York Giants were playing the Brooklyn Dodgers at The Polo Grounds The two teams hated each other. Baseball was the #1 game in the country and New York City had 3 Major League teams...two of them in the National League. The Dodgers and Giants were playing game 3 of a three game playoff series for the National League Pennant. Down 4-1 in the ninth, the Giants began to rally when Alvin Dark and Don Mueller led off with singles against Don Newcombe. After Irvin fouled out, Whitey Lockman hit an RBI double that made it 4-2. Mueller broke his ankle sliding into third and was replaced by pinch-runner Clint Hartung — in fact, a little more than a month ago, Hartung died. Branca then relieved Newcombe and on an 0-1 pitch, Thomson connected. And the rest, really, was history. It was "The Shot Heard 'round The World!" Russ Hodges, the Giants' announcer repeatedly screamed, "THE GIANTS WIN THE PENNANT!"
The remarkable thing about the Giants winning the pennant was the fact that they won 37 or their last 44 games before the playoff series.

A couple of footnotes, a few years later, Thompson was traded to the Milwaukee Braves. Thompson broke his ankle and was replaced on the roster by a rookie named Hank Aaron.

The guy who coined the phrase, "It ain't over til it's over," Yogi Berra, was at the game where Thompson hit the home run. Yogi had left the ballpark early in hopes of beating the traffic.

In New York, the Giants are gone, The Polo Grounds are gone, now Bobby Thompson is gone...the memory remains!

Air Pelosi

Imentioned that I do not like hypocrites. Well, I don't. This includes, but is not limited to, politicians. Politicians like Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi:
This is PELOSI'S NEW JET!

Queen Pelosi wasn't happy with the small USAF C-20B jet, Gulf Stream III that comes with the Speaker's job ... OH NO! Queen Pelosi was aggravated that this little jet had to stop to refuel, so she ordered a Big Fat, 200-seat, USAF C-32, Boeing 757 jet that could get her back to California without stopping!

Since she only works 3 days a week, this gas guzzling jet gets fueled, and she flies home to California every Friday and returns every Monday, at a cost to the taxpayers (YOU and ME are those taxpayers!) of about $60,000, one way!

Unfortunately we have to pay to bring her back on Monday night and that costs us another $60,000! Taxpayers, that is $480,000 per month and that is an annual cost to us of $5,760,000!!!

Queen Pelosi wants you and me to conserve our carbon footprint. She wants us to buy smaller cars and Obama wants us to get a bicycle pump and air up our tires. Who do these people think they are???

This is outrageous. Keep in mind the figures above do NOT include the cost of plane or crew...just the fuel!!! One has to wonder what the total package costs us?

And on top of that ... now she wants to tax our IRA's & 401K's!

(Thanks, Benny)

NFL Wisdom?

So, the Colts are playing a preseason game, at home in Indianapolis. It is scheduled on the NFL channel. Keep in mind that I pay for the NFL channel. At game time, I find that the game has been blacked out in my area. I live 90 miles from Indianapolis and I was blacked out. OK, I realize that the NFL is struggling and needs every penny they can extort.
I come to work, today, and I find out that the local Indianapolis TV station broadcast the game - LIVE. That's right! Local - in market - broadcast TV carries the game while the NFL's pay station blacks me out - 90 miles away. I'm so far from Indianapolis that I can't receive the Indy TV station's signal!
NFL big shots should also realize that there was a NASCAR race and a PGA tournament airing at the same time. Don't worry, NFL, I turned off the TV.....and did yard work.